PROVIDENCE — More than 300 couples and their families gathered in the Cathedral of SS. Peter and Paul on October 14 to renew their marriage vows and celebrate wedding anniversaries from 25 years all the way to 70 years.
Bishop Thomas J. Tobin celebrated the Mass, which was the first celebrated in many years in the Diocese and may become an annual tradition.
In his homily, Bishop Tobin congratulated the married couples on their amazing milestones and commented on the hard work needed to keep a marriage together.
“Even though you look back with gratitude and joy and thank God for all his blessings, we know that through the years it has not always been easy for you,” he said.
“No doubt, every couple here has experienced certain sacrifices and challenges in their life together. It's not always easy to get along, I suppose,” he added.
Keeping a marriage together is no small feat, he told the couples. “There have been good times and bad, no doubt. Those with joy and sorrow, sickness and health, successes and failures, life and death, but through it all you've been survivors. Long before the TV reality show you are survivors.” he added, addressing the amused congregation.
Bishop Tobin injected humor throughout his homily. He opened with the requisite Pittsburgh Steeler’s joke — he never misses an opportunity to take a jab at the Pat’s fans who comprise his diocese, and also told another well-received joke about a quarrelsome couple involving a husband who said he would dance on his wife’s grave to which she immediately retorted that she had decided to be buried at sea.
“I hope I didn't give anyone any ideas,” Bishop Tobin laughed.
The bishop also discussed the true meaning of love, beginning with comments found on the Internet from children about love. “Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt and then he wears it. love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs,” wrote another girl.
Bishop Tobin expounded on the children's definitions of love: “Love involves giving and sharing and sacrifice, it's a giving of self to others.” He added that “despite our problems and our challenges, love means that we will always be faithful. That's the foundation of holy matrimony as designed by God, blessed by our Lord Jesus Christ.”
He ended the homily with a prayer for the couples: “Dear friends, dear honored couples, we thank you for your witness. We are proud of you and we pray that God will bless you abundantly in the days and years to come.”
The couples then renewed their wedding vows, pledging to continue to love each other unconditionally through sickness and health, good times and bad.
Following the Mass, Bishop Tobin and all of the couples attended a reception held in the basement of the Cathedral. Each couple received a certificate commemorating the event and had the opportunity to take a picture with the bishop. Volunteers from diocesan agencies and St. Raphael Academy served cake and punch and couples from throughout the Diocese spent time socializing.
Louis and Margherita Cosentino, who have been married for 63 years and attend St. Augustine Church in Providence, were among the couple's enjoying themselves. “It was nice to renew our vows,” said Louis Cosentino. His wife added that it was the fifth time they had renewed vows during their marriage. Their secret to staying together for more than half a century is three-fold: “Love and commitment and belief in the vows we took,” she said. It also didn’t hurt that they were married on Louis Cosentino's birthday, so he never forgot their wedding anniversary, they both added.
It seems every couple has their own secret to making a marriage last. Teodosina and Rafael Martinez have been married for 50 years and attend Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary Parish in Providence. The secret to a half-century of togetherness: “God ... and be patient,” said Martinez.
Helen and Joe Rabbitt, another couple who has reached the half-century mark, echoed the Martinez’ advice.
“You have to have a third person in the marriage and that person is Jesus, and if he’s not there you can just give up,” said Helen Rabbit. The Rabbitt’s attended the ceremony with several other couples from their parish, St. Theresa of the Child Jesus in Pawtucket, and all wore yellow corsages given to them by their pastor, Father Joseph Paquette. One of those couples, Joan and Clarence St. Jacques, also married for 50 years, had additional advice: “You've got to learn to say you're sorry,” said Joan St. Jacques. “After the honeymoon, then you have to work at the real love.”
Rocco Rabaiotti, who has been married to his wife, Concetta, for 60 years and attends St. Bartholomew Parish, Providence said his secret to staying married was simple: “They don't make them like her anymore.”
