PROVIDENCE — Middle school is an awkward time for everyone, even Miss America beauty pageant contestants.
"I hated my middle school years. It was not that fun for me," Jessica Marfeo, Miss Rhode Island, told a classroom of 7th grade students at Bishop McVinney School in Providence.
Marfeo, 20, an Exeter native, visited the Providence Catholic school on Nov. 8 to spread the message of respect, compassion and understanding she has been promoting since Marfeo created her "Best Friends First" educational program while still in high school.
"When you say things, you can't take them back. So think before you say something," Marfeo said during a classroom exercise where she asked a student to put toothpaste back into its tube.
Since being crowned Miss Rhode Island earlier this year, Marfeo — a triple major at the University of Rhode Island — has been traveling across the state, visiting two schools a week to promote her "BFF" program.
While meeting with preschoolers and elementary school kids, Marfeo at times uses a stuffed dinosaur and reads from a children's book to teach her audience the importance of the Golden Rule, or treating others how they would like to be treated.
"Be respectful! Be kind! Share!" Marfeo said as she led a preschool class through the three "superhero powers."
"You are now superheroes of the Golden Rule," Marfeo said.
For older audiences, Marfeo talks about the dynamics behind bullying, peer pressure, dating, and other sensitive topics that can make it difficult to navigate the middle and high school years.
"Think before you act... You don't know what's going on in someone's life at home," said Marfeo, a product of Catholic education who attended the former St. Francis of Assisi School in Warwick, and The Prout School in Wakefield.
Marfeo said her Catholic faith has helped her through some challenging times. She was diagnosed with cancer at the age of 5, and battled the disease until she was 13, when it went into remission. However, her brother, Michael, died of brain cancer when he was only two years old.
"I didn't lose my faith. I still had my life," Marfeo said, adding that she feels her brother is a guardian angel always watching over her.
Her family's struggles with cancer is motivating Marfeo to pursue a career in the medical field. She is majoring in elementary education, biology and pre-med, though she took this semester off from URI to focus on her Miss Rhode Island duties.
Competing in the Miss America pageant and securing more than $88,000 in scholarships has given Marfeo a freedom from anxiety over college debt and the confidence to stand up before a room of people and make her voice heard.
Marfeo answered several questions from her 7th grade audience, including how she walks so well in heels, to whether she lost friends who may have been jealous over her beauty pageant crown and how she handled the pressure of the Miss America pageant.
"My faith has been my biggest support," Marfeo said.
Several students said they were surprised to learn that Miss Rhode Island has not had a perfect, stress-free life.
"I never imagined that she would have some of the same experiences as us. I thought she'd be perfect," said Aryana Regino, 13.
Luis Rivera, 13, said he was impressed by Marfeo's humility, beauty and intelligence.
"I liked that she seemed excited to be with us," Luis said.
Awa Touray, 12, said Marfeo's talk was "inspiring."
"It changed my perspective on beauty pageants," Awa said, "in a positive way."
